When horror and comedy blend together so well, you just know that you have something special. In Re-Animator, you get an extremely tongue in cheek adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft story combined with a zombie movie angle that would make you think Romero had a hand in this in some way. 20 years later, this movie has continued to maintain a life of its own, which is ironic considering the subject matter.
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What makes a game addictive? Is it fast paced, short term game play? Or is it long term game play with rewards to draw the gamer in? Puzzle games and RPGs… I don’t think anyone every really thought they belonged together in a big way. But here we are, face to face with this addictive fusion.

Let me get this out of the way first: every thing about this game is mediocre at best.

Graphically, Puzzle Quest is nothing special, but then again it doesn’t really need to be. The over world is pretty bland and the enemies and characters are about as generic as can be.

In the sound department there is even less sparkle. The sound effects are quiet and lame, and the music is repetative and boring. But, this actually came as a good thing to me, because it gave me reason to listen to listen to albums that I needed to catch up on while playing games.

Being an RPG, there must be some sort of story, right? Well, there is, and like the graphics, it’s all generic. You’ll find knights, dwarves, orcs, sorcerers, castles, wolves, and pretty much anything else you would expect to find in an RPG.

The enemies are limited, but it’s not like it really matters, because you won’t really notice the difference between enemies in battle, except when they use a move that actually does some damage. Be prepared to fight lots and lots of orcs and wolves…

Now that I’ve trashed just about every aspect of the game, let me move on to why the game doesn’t suck one bit.

The battles in Puzzle Quests are simply addictive. Based on the Bejeweled game play style, the battles are simple on the surface but really require some sharp tactics at times. Most of it is luck, but paying attention to the best moves and gaining a knack for predicting upcoming moves really helps. The battles do get a bit repetative, but only because of the initial board. If you change up what moves you start with, so will the computer opponents. Spells provide a means to really blast your enemies, but a good bit of planning is involved. Several spells work together nicely, so rounding out your mana reserves, although challenging, provides great rewards.

Winning battles provides experience and gold, both of which will be vital to your success. Levelling up allows you to improve various statistics from health and damage to different mana strenghts. Gold will help to buy items as well as build up your main city to grant you abilities ranging from learning enemy spells to paying gold to improve stats.

There is plenty to do in Puzzle Quests. As I said, you can build up your city for several nice abilities, you can search for runes to create items, and you can take cities under siege to make them your own. Plus there is always multiplayer combat to pit your warrior against a friend’s.

When it comes down to it, despite the fact that just about everything on the game’s surface sucks, the core game play is so damned addictive that it is impossible to give Puzzle Quests a bad rating. There is plenty to do and it makes a perfect portable game that takes as little as 5 minutes to play. If you are looking for something that will be long lasting, but also not require a huge time investment, look no further, because it is here.

Hotel Dusk is a game that’s sure to either blow people away or quickly lose their interest. It is a text-heavy adventure that is often slow moving and full of puzzles. However, one thing most will agree on is that the game’s art is inspired and visually striking. The most common reference that people cite is the music video for “Take On Me” by A-Ha, and that’s not really a bad comparison. The game also sports an absolutely fantastic translation and you would never guess that it is in fact a Japanese made game. The setting is American, the characters are American, and it has all the charm of a classic crime and mystery noir.

Your character is Kyle Hyde, a former cop still on the trail of his ex-partner, who you quickly learn has betrayed you at some point in the past. This is a very important plot point that you will eventually come to learn plays a role in every guest in the hotel. While the likelihood of every single guest being a clue to your own mystery makes the plausibility of the story seem a little less believable, the story’s subplots are very captivating and are integrated into the main story masterfully. Additionally, the story deals with a lot of overarching themes like fate, hope, and betrayal. Kyle systematically goes through each character and uncovers the truth of their past, sometimes resorting to getting rough and rude with the person, though occasionally having to have more tact. In the end, he finds perhaps a lot deeper meaning in the hotel with no way out for a day, forced to take seemingly innocent people and find out all their secrets in order to uncover more about his own secrets. While not being able to leave the hotel is of course a design decision (can’t let you go anywhere you want, after all), this symbolizes a lot about Kyle and how he feels trapped and confined to the past in his life, and how he’s forced to face his past at the hotel by getting others to do the same (since they too seem like they are trapped within the hotel’s drab walls). The story is one of the more fulfilling ones you could find on a portable platform, or just any platform in general. It feels like it could have been a standout title even in the adventure games’ heyday on PC in the early 90’s.

Aside from the story and the beautiful sketchwork character portraits, the other standout feature of Hotel Dusk is the fact that you hold the DS sideways in order to play. This often sets one character on one screen and the protaganist on the other during conversations, and while walking around in the hotel, the touchscreen is an interactive point and move map and the other screen shows a first person viewpoint of where you are going. It almost feels to strange to control the game like that at first, and there almost seems to be no reason for it. But as your progress in the game, you realize that allowing this view point allows for larger character portraits, the feeling of characters actually talking back and forth to one another, and occasionally, beautiful artwork across both screens. And it’s hard to ignore the fact that Kyle carries a notebook and the DS resembles a small notebook while holding it sideways. There’s also several innovative uses of the touch screen and the folding top within the game play, such as turning a finished puzzle over onto the back by closing the lid, or searching for prints by blowing chalk off a pen. Throughout the game, I kept getting to these parts and thinking “wow, that’s genius.” Perfect use of the DS, and signs that the developer really thought out every feature of the system to use within gameplay.

The stylus movement I had little issues with the entire game, as it just never really felt completely natural to point to areas on the map to make the character go there. Additionally, because you have to look at the map touchscreen to see where you are going, it detracts from the 3D view on the top screen. You can control Kyle with the D-Pad, but at least for a lefty like myself, this felt very awkward. Speaking of the 3D view on the top screen, I would have to say that the graphics during this part are serviceable at best. There’s a lot of low poly textures throughout the game, but for the most part you can tell what everything is and it is not a huge issue. When they show characters in the hallway, it definitely looks poor, as it is a fuzzy low resolution 2D drawing of the character on a 3D plane. No doubt this is likely due to the limit on the DS’s 3D ability, but seeing other games push these supposed limits into impressive feats like Final Fantasy III and Metroid Prime Hunters, I was a little let down at points.

If there’s one more thing I could criticize, it is that the game leaves you hanging in a few places with very few clues as to what to do next. So more times than not, you will have to wander the halls looking for someone who will talk to you, or an item that you previously ignored. Given that there are a lot of rooms and it takes a long time to inspect everything, this can be a very tedious process. You can play for an hour and not make any progress. There were a few times where I just got fed up and looked for a hint online. Most of the time, it will be logical, but there are definitely a few “huh?” moments.

The music on the whole is pretty good, and the best music almost always coming during interrogation, revelation, or sad parts of the game. The wandering around the hotel music and a few people’s themes are a little bland and forgettable, but it was good enough for me to seek out and listen to outside the game. It’s a mix of piano ballads and moody melodies for the most part, which plays well to the setting and the style of the game.

Additionally, the game even offers a bit of replay, with some new areas to explore and a bit more story upon beating it a second time. However, the game isn’t short, and most people will be more than glad to finish it once and leave it at that. All the mysteries are uncovered at that point and the few revelations a second play through shows are better found out via YouTube than spending another 20 hours on a second game. It’s at least better than Phoenix Wright where once the game is over, there’s nothing left to do.

Speaking of Phoenix Wright, I began playing PW2 after Hotel Dusk and couldn’t help but think that Dusk has a lot of great qualities that the Ace Attorney series would do well to incorporate in the future. More free will roaming from place to place (including direct control of the character), giving the protagonist a more active role in the story, and more logical pacing. There wasn’t really a point where you were begging for something to be over in this game, and the length felt just right for the story it told. This is one of the more outstanding exclusive titles for the DS, and while not everyone will love it for the same reason that adventure games are usually dismissed, it has a fascinating story and endearing, lifelike characters. It’s worth finding and playing.

1. The Movie: Good/Bad

Okay, so I probably shouldn’t be giving this episode two ratings. But I kinda backed myself into a corner with the guidelines I made, so I’m shit outta luck. I call the movie in this episode “Good/Bad” because the movie itself is almost schizophrenic. One the one hand, you have the “plot”. Because this episode is edited to hell(hell, this was apparently one of those “grindhouse” movies back in the day), the freaking plot is almost non-existant. To be honest, a lot of it is hypothesis of mine after watching this episode multiple times. So here goes:

PLOT: The Hellcats are a biker gang that likes to get high and have a good time. They run drugs from Mexico to some big boss guy who likes to have oily dudes around him. The movie starts at a funeral for one of the Hellcats, who apparently was working with the cops (who just happen to be there to fill us in on this backstory) and was about to rat them all out. Turns out this is the brother of Ross Hagen (Monte, the main character) and the wife of Linda (who Ross makes out with, which is kinda weird to make out with your dead brother’s wife not one week after he’s dead). Monte apparently was in the Army, and has lots of moments of speaking of peace, but he agrees to inflitrate the Hellcats to take over for his brother and try to bring the drug ring down. He succeeds in winning them over, becoming the leader of the crew with some stupid tractor pull, and makes out with other women in the gang. When a trafficking expedition goes wrong, the cops start to get evidence on the Hellcats and the big boss man starts to make his moves. It all ends with the Hellcats winning, the big boss man getting his come-uppance, and Monte eventually loving hi motorcycle (big fucking whoop).

So, this plot sucks, it makes no sense when you watch the episode, and frankly, the plot slows the movie down by it’s complete idiocy. So why the Good/Bad? Because there is everything else that has nothing to do with the plot. It’s the crappy songs, drug-induced idiocy of the gang, and the five minute interludes of nothing but riding motorcycles that makes me like this episode. It sets up comments from Joel and the Bots perfectly. Which leads me to….something other than the riffing. (Damn transitions.)

The Host Segments:

Okay, weakest part of the episode by far, one of the weakest bunch of host segments in the season.

SOL Invention Exchange - Sign language translator. This is actually pretty funny and a good idea. Joel does his prop magic to create a sign language translator. Speak into the funnel, and it automatically translates your words into sign language! GOOD IDEA! It also references older episode, like Sidehackers (202).

Deep 13 Invention Exchange: None. Oops? No invention exchange. But the hobby hogs from Wild Rebels (207) are back because, of course, this is a biker film. Hilarity ensues.

This episode has “flashbacks” to older host segments, which is funny in theory. In theory that they are mocking flashback episodes from a normal sitcom, it is funny. In reality, it’s watching funny you’ve already seen. What’s even more confusing, they flash back to Season 1, which has a different set and a DIFFERENT VOICE FOR TOM SERVO! WTF? It’s really not funny. But what is funny…(yay transitions!)

The Riffs:

A lot of people think that Joel and the Bots didn’t do such a good job with this episode. I couldn’t disagree more. I really like this episode’s riffing. It’s almost a perfect slice of the laid back, take your time with the jokes style of delivery that personified Season 2 and, to an extent, Season 3. Though the true Golden Age of MST3K began with Godzilla vs. Megalon (212), this episode shows what they do best: make fun of the film, have personality and criticize each other’s riffs (they really become self-aware of their riffing in this season), don’t force too many jokes where they don’t belong, try their best to get through the episode with a light spirit by the end, and one of the big things that MST3K eventually gave up: reference previous episodes. I watched this episode on tape before I had seen all the other Season 2 episodes that came before this one. Once I downloaded and watched those old episodes, it was like a new light was cast on the jokes. They reference not only the older biker episodes, but lots of other episodes from Season 1 and Season 2. It might seem like a small thing, but it leads to a greater appreciation of EVERY episode when you are reminded of that episode later on. It makes the series a whole, instead of just individual episodes, strung along by the premise. Some might not notice or care, but it makes a big difference to me.

All in all, I’m giving this a Good, because the film is schizo on the quality and the host segments are weak, but in my opinion, once you’ve watched the previous Season 2 episodes, you’ll agree that the riffing helps this episode out tremendously and it really is the “forgotten episode” in terms of riffing quality.

I was skeptical at first when Final Fantasy XII came out. I was unsure about the new battle system. The Final Fantasy series has always used random enemy encounters as part of the battle system and I liked this system. Perhaps I got attached; after all, I did begin playing turn based RPGs in 1990 with the first Dragon Warrior title. FFXII did away with random encounters and introduced a new system where enemies appear with you on the world map. This new battle system revitalized the Final Fantasy series. It made the gaming experience flow better and was a good way to keep the series fresh. Square Enix did a marvelous job completing FFXII. This has become one of my top five Final Fantasies because it was innovative, fun, and artistically beautiful.

Not only is the battle system retooled for this latest installment in the long running series, but also way you develop your characters has been redone. Gone are the sphere grid and character classes. Welcome in the license board. For those people who played FF Tactics Advance on the GBA, the license concept should seem similar. The basic premise is that you have to acquire a license in order to use a particular kind of magic, equip certain types of armor or weapons, use a special skill, or equip a relic. It is similar to the sphere grid used in FFX and FFX-2 because everything is connected and to get from point A to point B one must purchase the licenses in between. You gain AP points from defeating enemies, and those points are used to purchase licenses from the board. It is one of the innovative features found in this game. The license system is nice because you can customize your characters anyway you want. You could turn the hulking big guy into a white mage and the small-framed girl into your tank. You are no longer stuck taking certain characters because they make the more balanced party. There is no negative to taking the characters you want. It is a nice feeling.

This leads us to the other big innovation, the battle system. Taking a page from Final Fantasy XI, FFXII makes for a smoother playing experience. By smoother I mean that a flashing screen leading into a turned based battle does not interrupt the gameplay. I really don’t mind the random encounters but they can get annoying when I am trying to explore a certain area. FFXII is great because if you are just exploring you can by pass enemies simply by running around them. Managing your three characters during combat is simple too. You can buy and find these little trinkets called gambits. Each gambit grants your characters a new strategy for combat. For example, there are gambits for attacking enemies who are almost going to die, attacking flying enemies first, using a certain type of spell to attack, healing when your HP gets to a certain percentage, and curing party members that get poisoned. It is a very easy system to use and works for the most part. You can choose the order of priority too. Each character can equip several gambits at a time so you can have one person take care of status aliments while another worries about restoring health. The only downside to the new battle system is that the larger than life boss battles are gone. Some enemies and bosses are larger but not like before. I think it has to due with the fact that in random enemy encounters there are fixed camera angles, which allow the boss to dwarf your characters. Other than that, being able to run around willy-nilly and choose who you attack is an awesome attribute of this game.

The art style and sound in FFXII are wonderfully done. The art is similar to Vagrant Story. The character design and backgrounds are similar because it combines a futuristic look with a medieval look. The characters have wonderful facial expressions and the cut-scenes are amazing. I was surprised that the PS2 could produce these beautiful graphics. The in-game graphics won’t win any awards but the cut-scenes are terrific. The sound and music in FFXII is up to par with any of the other FF titles. The game is filled with similar sounds and music to the FF series, but also contains new compositions that fit the game very well. Every song fits the mood of the situation and the setting to perfection. The voice acting is the best in this series as well as great compared to other RPGs that incorporate voice acting. Lines are delivered well and each voice brings out the individual in each character that could be lost by the lack of classes.

The only weakness (and it’s not even that weak) is the story. It is your classic rebels versus the empire archetype. Not very original but it still manages to become its own game. The uniqueness of the characters, the side quests, and the direction the story takes in the later parts of the game provide for a different experience. Despite the lack of originality, FFXII will hold your attention and make you want to press forward in the storyline.

Square Enix did a fantastic job with Final Fantasy XII. I encourage RPG fans and FF fans to check this game out and enjoy a great time. You can complete this game in about 40 hours if you complete just the main storyline. If you want to get all the espers (summons) and do all the side quests you will have to spend about 80-100 hours doing everything. There is a bit of a learning curve and you will die a few times but that is part of the fun. Give FFXII a try and find out if you agree with me, or decide if I am an idiot.

Just a note, there’s spoilers in this review.

When I looked at the synopsis for this movie, I knew there was gonna be problems before I even saw it. I’m not usually an “I told you so” type guy, but back when the buzz around 2 died off, and everyone was craving Venom to appear, I just had this bad feeling about introducing him. That said, I wouldn’t have had a problem with the movie if that was the main focus. However, we also get Sandman and a new Goblin, making 3 villains for a new movie. History has shown this rarely works out well. The Batman film series has run the gamut as far as villain overload. It has shown us it can work great (Batman Begins - Ra’s Al Ghuul and Scarecrow), mediocre (Batman Returns - Catwoman, Penguin, and Christopher Walken), and abhorrent (Batman Forever and Batman and Robin…let’s just leave it at that). But one thing of note, some of the more highly revered comic book movies have dealt with one villain. X-Men had Magneto. X2 had Stryker. And notice X3 began to fall apart when it introduced more villains to the mix instead of focusing on one. Even the Spider-Man movies previous to this have really focused on one at a time. First it was the Goblin, then it was Doc Ock. There’s dozens of examples.

However, this still could have worked. The problem came down to villain choice. Venom requires you to introduce the black suit. It’s an alien symbiote that’s already hard to believably integrate into a movie, and here they barely make an effort to make it set up the story. A meteorite with black goo in it falls near Peter’s moped and hops on for a ride. Awesome. Furthermore, the implications of the black suit require you to show Peter in love with the suit at first, then slowly losing control and realizing it’s taking over. Finally, he realizes it has to be removed and he succeeds, only to have Eddie Brock receive the symbiote and proceed to make Peter’s life hell. Then an epic fight, Spidey prevails, etc. You get the point. It’s a lot of stuff to introduce into one movie. In fact, that sounds like a great outline for Spider-Man 3 to dedicate the entire time to developing.

The problem is that all these plot points are addressed, but it is done in such a way that is either too quick or entirely glazed over. The symbiote’s intelligence is barely indicated, and for most of the movie is just shown as a black suit. Peter is shown waking up not knowing what has happened, much like the comics, but there are no dire results due to this. In the comics, the suit went out as violent vigilante while Peter slept. This was one of the big reasons he needed to get rid of it. He had no control. They address the anger and mood swings, but almost entirely as Peter Parker and not Spider-Man. His problems keeping himself from killing thugs and supervillains was another source of problems. But here, you see him confront Sandman once while in such a state. And you aren’t entirely sure that the fight is that much out of character considering the circumstances. Regardless, we get Brock being humiliated by Parker in a similar fashion to the comics, which I feel is one of the few things they really did well in this movie. Topher Grace isn’t really an ideal actor for the typical portrayal of Eddie Brock, but he makes it his own and fills the character with a little bit of his own sarcasm, humor, and anger, and incorporates essential parts of the Brock character as well. However, then we get to Venom. After Peter ditches the suit, we have Venom to deal with. This is really something that should have been a cliffhanger for a 4th movie, but considering that might not be made, they had to stuff Venom harassing Spider-Man and attacking his weak points and making his life miserable all in a few scenes. The result is an okay portrayal, but a shadow of the great story arc it could have been. There wasn’t even a scene where Venom seriously threatened to reveal Spider-Man’s true identity, the ultimate payback for Eddie. Very disappointing handling of this story.

But it isn’t a surprise when the movie is also dealing with the subplot of Sandman’s escape from prison, turning into Sandman, committing crimes to save his daughter, and then teaming up with Venom for the final attack scene on Spidey. Sandman is actually made into a great character for this movie, and Thomas Haden Church does a terrific job adding depth to an essentially one-dimensional character from the comics. If the movie would have focused just on Sandman as the main villain, I would have been very happy as well. Then there is the subplot of Harry Osbourn wanting to kill Spider-Man, then having amnesia, being Pete’s best friend again, then wanting to kill Pete again, then being friends again. This whole plot would not work near as well if it wasn’t for the fact that James Franco is just a really great, likable actor. You on one hand hate him one minute, then can’t help but love his goofy charm the next. Finally you get the relationship trouble Mary Jane subplot, which has a large amount of screen time. This entire part is very sloppy, with the addition of ANOTHER character (Gwen Stacy, add another with her father in a small but important role) and a forced tension between her and Peter that pushes MJ away. This is all way too much story to cover for a 2+ hour film. The result is exactly as you think it would be: a feeling of mishmashed, half finished ideas that are rushed through and not near as good as they could have been.

Then there is the matter of the cheese in this movie. I mean, I know the other 2 had some cheesy moments, but this one is almost over the top. The “evil Peter Parker”, as many have already discussed, for some reason had to be portrayed with eyeliner and an emo-band style haircut, prompting laughing from the crowd at many moments when the movie wasn’t trying to be funny. This didn’t happen to Venom. Then there is the cheesy “Peter being cool” musical montages. While they have some sort of goofy charm to some people, I just found them groan inducing. There’s a fair share of lines throughout the movie that are like that too.

Another problem was uncharacterisic behavior from some main characters. Why would Peter Parker risk being unmasked in front of all of New York for a half-masked kiss for the cameras? Why would he show any interest in Gwen to start with if he’s really that into MJ as the movie tries to show? Would Eddie Brock really being that mad at Peter Parker for getting him fired from a freelance photo job and taking his would-be girlfriend that he would team up with another villain and put on some elaborate scheme to kill Spider-Man? You could say the suit has something to do with it, and I guess I can accept that, but I still wasn’t completely sold. Why did Sandman think it was a great idea to just keep growing bigger and bigger? What kind of idiot thinks King Kong size is a great way to swat two very quick targets? Why wouldn’t MJ just talk to Peter about struggling to find an identity with her boyfriend being Spider-Man? And why….WHY is Spider-Man unmasked so fucking much? Holy hell. I can barely remember a time in the comics when Spider-Man was out in public freely unmasked and not seeming to care. His identity was a huge deal in the comics, and here he seems to have no problem showing any villain just who he is. He did this in Spider-Man 2 as well, and it bothered me then, but it was forgivable because the movie was much better.

So I’ve pretty much laid out what I didn’t like. There were some good parts. As I have already said, Sandman and pre-Venom Eddie Brock were laid out very well. Harry’s redemption was done well too, for the most part. The final battle was a visual treat for action fans, and all the Sandman action scenes were great. While his corny “falling into a giant science experiment” origin could have been improved, the whole sequence of him reforming from sand was absolutely amazing. Gwen looked the part and was great in a role that didn’t really need to exist in this movie. Venom looked pretty fearsome. Bruce Campbell was perfect. He stole the entire movie in a short scene. Ted Raimi was great too in his small cameo.

Overall, the movie was certainly watchable, as all 3 have been. But if they had removed either Venom or gone only with Venom in this movie, it would have been a much stronger film. As it is, it feels like more villains were put in the movie to sell more merchandise. Also, for the most expensive modern movie made to date, some of the effects here and there looked a little weak. Specifically a few times when Spider-Man is jumping around, and when the building is collapsing due to the crane accident. Most of it looks great, but there were definitely a few spots where i looked at it and immediately saw computer generated graphics instead of a building collapsing or a super hero swinging from buildings. Regardless, this review won’t stop many people from seeing it anyway, but just be warned that this movie definitely isn’t at the standard set by the second film.

I don’t quite know what overcame me to shell out the dollar and change for a pack of Trident Splash Apple with Raspberry. Perhaps it was my open mind and curiosity to try something new or maybe it’s because my previous encounter with Trident Splash was rather enjoyable; what is known, however, is that this particular flavor of gum is comparable to the dregs in a bucket of week-old vomit. I wasn’t clued in by the sugar-free branding of the package nor did I register the awful flavor combination of apple and raspberry: the two aren’t compatible by any manipulation of ones taste-buds.
Eager to wipe out the remnants of a particularly greasy meal, I popped my first piece. I didn’t taste raspberry nor apple, but rather an amalgam of horribly artificial crap. This ensuing explosion of raspapple unleased a torrent of saliva but not quite in the way one would imagine…no, this was not a delectable treat at all! My body was trying (in vain) to flood my mouth to the extent that I could only spit out the gum, yet regardless I chewed and indulged myself. In a matter of seconds I became violently aware that I was tasting a barely recognizable minty flavor, a vile and bastardized taste indeed. I eventually convulsed and expelled this agent of insipidity.
“Maybe that was just a singularly bad piece” I thought, and so I began to chew another. No such luck at all, unfortunately, and the full extent of my horrible mistake was realized when, in a desperate attempt to somehow improve upon the catastrophe manifested in my mouth, I wolfed down the remaining pieces. As the comic character Calvin once observed, doing so only results in a mass of gum which can only be akin to chewing a giant soggy sock, but this sock is a minty/fruity wad of shit.

Heed my words, fellow gum aficionados, and steer clear of this tripe; while I enjoy flavor combinations as much as the next guy there are some cardinal rules to mixing and clearly raspberry and apple are two which are not to be combined!

What do “Livin’ on a Prayer”, “Wanted Dead or Alive”, and “You Give Love a Bad Name” all have in common other than being Bon Jovi songs? All of these songs are found on one album, Slippery When Wet. These three songs form the foundation of one of the greatest albums to emerge from the decade of the 1980’s. Because of Slippery When Wet, Bon Jovi rocketed onto the music scene and is often given credit for paving the way for other pop metal bands like Poison, Warrant, and Cinderella. While I feel this statement is exaggerated, Bon Jovi was definitely one of the first mainstream pop metal bands.

Commercially they were able to sell the genre to just about everyone that listened. The radio friendly lyrics, pretty boy look, and catchy songs propelled Bon Jovi to stardom with an assist to MTV for taking advantage of the bands physical appeal. But saying that Bon Jovi launched pop metal is lunacy. Bon Jovi just emerged at the right time when that genre of music was becoming popular. It is similar to Nirvana. They were not the first grunge band; they just showed up at the right time. Regardless of their place in music history, Bon Jovi’s Slippery When Wet is still an amazing album.

Hair bands love rock and roll, and they like to prove their devotion by singing about it. Slippery When Wet begins with “Let it Rock” and later in the album we find “Raise Your Hands” both of which are anthems to the power of rock. Describing a typical weekend of going to a club where you finding girls dancing on tables, and hearing rock blasting from the radio, “Let it Rock” is an awesome song. It is a precursor to the amount of rock you are about to experience. Ironically it also filled with foreshadowing. The title, “Let it Rock,” is the first example that informs listeners to the amount of rock they are about to hear. “You can’t stop a fire burning out of control” is another example of how addictive this album is, and it is Bon Jovi’s cry about how rock spreads. “Raise Your Hands” is probably the most underrated song on the album. It is catchy, fun to listen to, and will get you pumped. It reminds people to let loose when they listen to a good rock song.

Next we have the Bon Jovi song that got me hooked on this band, “You Give Love a Bad Name.” Everyone knows this song as soon as it begins with that roaring line, “Shot through the heart and you’re to blame, darling you give love a bad name.” The amazing thing about this song is that everyone can relate to it. It is about a woman is innocent and seems to be the one for the person in the song. However, things go a rye when she does something to him. It is never stated what, but there is the implication that she manipulated him or led him on in some way. The wonderful thing is that women can also relate to this song. Another perspective one could take away from this song is that men get attached too quickly and move too fast into relationships. Either way people can relate. It is intriguing to hear a song that both men and women could apply to themselves in the same way.

Third we have the song that should have been my class song, but nooooo some worthless Three Doors Down, or Third Eye Blind, or Thrice, or Three Dog Night song was voted to be our class song. I put down “Livin’ on a Prayer” and it made it to the final ballot. Then loses! What crap is that?! It was rigged I tell ya, rigged! Anyhoo, “Livin’ on a Prayer” is the most popular song from the album and has become a rock anthem. “Livin’ on a Prayer” describes Tommy and Gina. Both are struggling in their careers and can’t make enough money. But Gina proclaims that they’ve “gotta hold on to what they got. It doesn’t make a difference if we make it or not. We’ve got each other and that’s a lot for love, we’ll give it a shot.” Let the inspiration flow forth. This is definitely one song that is designed to uplift people, or motivate a group of college kids to break out in song at the most inappropriate time.

One of the more compelling tracks is “Social Disease.” It seems to refer to any number of STD’s a person can contract from nights of promiscuity. The promiscuity comes in the form of prostitutes and unsafe encounters. The songs talks about infections that appear on the body and how people are not able to get away from the infections. It is the deepest song on the album and the one that has the most to say.

Another staple of many rock albums is a song that refers to touring and being on the road. “Wanted Dead or Alive” performs this function. It isn’t a song about touring stadium after stadium; it’s about a band that is beginning their career. The band plans venues where people may not be welcoming to them, but they still have to play there to make money. As the song progresses so does the band. They were determined to make it and by the end of the song they talk about rocking millions of people. It is a great song that builds from the beginning to a quality rock song.

Of course an 80’s pop metal album needs a ballad or two. “Without You” and “Never Say Goodbye” are the two ballads on Slippery When Wet. “Without You” is a song about searching for love and how life feels so empty without loving someone. “Never Say Goodbye” is about memories and not wanting the best times of your past to go away. However, it is impossible to hang on to all the people in your life. People move on and grow apart emotionally or physically. This is one of the best singing performances by Jon because you can hear the anguish in his voice. Anguish created by having to let go of the past and even people you may have loved. Both are great ballads.

Rounding out the album is “I’d Die for You” and “Wild in the Streets.” These songs are more keyboard driven than the rest of the album. This creates a much more pop-like sound. “Wild in the Streets” is about kids growing up in a small town and how they are in control of the town. They were bad boys who corrupted girls and drove around recklessly. “I’d Die for You” is a rocking love song. It is a song that speaks of the power of love and how they don’t need anything else but each other. Both of these songs are fast paced and complete the album nicely.

Slippery When Wet has something for everyone. Ballads, anthems, songs that analyze society, all-out rock songs, and catchy pop songs are all on this album. The combination of Bon Jovi’s sound and the variety of songs makes this a must have album. There is diversity but it all has a similar quality that brings this album together. This is a classic album, and regardless of when it was made or by who, it deserves a listen.

It’s not a stretch to say that Metroid Prime was perhaps the most important game released in the Gamecube’s lifespan. While other games proved to be more popular, such as Smash Bros Melee and Resident Evil 4, Prime was not only the biggest risk for Nintendo, but also its greatest success. More than anything, the Prime series showed exactly how to bring a series to 3D without sacrificing the feel and core gameplay of the series. After Prime, Prime 2 came out at a strange time. By the time Prime 2 came out, it was up against a huge 2004 holiday season where Microsoft and Sony both had giant blockbusters taking all the spotlight. The Gamecube was struggling a bit at this point, just before the point where the system kinda began to disappear. The biggest disadvantage Metroid Prime 2 had was that it was essentially a first person action-adventure game, which is great, but it’s not a blockbuster like Halo 2 or Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, the big competition at the time. Prime 2 is really just an extension from the first game, giving us more of the great first person adventure qualities and mixing in more classic (screw attack!) and new (light/dark suits) abilities.

There have been improvements made here and there, however. Scanning items is now much easier and more intuitive due to distinct color coding. The story is much better and more immersing. There’s extra graphical touches here and there that really improve the overall look. But essentially, it’s feels very similar in both controls and look, which is a good thing. The story of the game sets up the big difference in this game, and it is a new planet called Aether that has been divided into a light world and dark world. It’s an old cliche, but it works here. You discover early on in the game that there is a dark world that quickly saps your strength and is full of stronger, twisted versions of enemies from the regular universe. And while Aether is generally and quiet peaceful place that is slowing decaying, Dark Aether is venomous and full of danger. Its world’s environment discourages exploration and focuses on survival. You move from safe point to safe point and try not to be exposed to its poisonous air. The game really does a great job changing the feel from one world to another and trying to differentiate between what’s essentially 2 versions of the same map. Many times, you cannot even tell you are in a room you visited in the light dimension.

I’ll be honest, I really hate the idea of dual worlds in games and really thought it was gonna be extremely repetitive and no fun. Add in the fact that your life constantly winds down in the other world (Shinobi for PS2 did this and it drove me mad), so that alone was probably reason enough I never pursued this game until recently. Perceptions are just that though, and it turns out that Retro Studios did a great job with a played out idea and managed to make it fun. The dark world starts out ominous and scary, like I said, but as you gain upgrades, you begin to get stronger in this world and can finally explore it more, like a true Metroid game. And as you go further in each world, you see the genius of the game design. There are portals that transfer you from world to world, and many times, Retro designed it so you must go through the other world in order to reach places unavailable in the light world, then return to explore a new area.

My big concern was that a second world would open the game up more than it already is, making it hard to find a coherent direction to head towards, or you would never know which world to be in. Turns out, the game makes it fairly simple to know where you should be. Most of the time, there is a certain couple tasks to solve while you are in whichever world. Then, the game inevitably leads you towards a portal to resume the game in the other world. It’s very much like the first Prime and the other games in the series, despite the initial impression. In fact, I would wager to say this game actually makes a bit more sense and has more direction that the first Prime, in most respects. The story is much more in depth and explained, and the world does seem to be alive with strange creatures and horrible evil. The music in the game helps this along, as Prime 2 features a much more organic, sparse soundtrack. It has very few memorable original “songs”, per se, and instead trades them in for strange sounds and alien rhythms, designed to make you feel like it’s part of this world. There are a fair share of reprised older Metroid songs, however, and these for the most part stand out as the best tracks on the soundtrack. The more environmental and background feel to the music in this game is actually a complement, and is not forgettable, as it is an important part of the feel of the game itself.

Where I feel the game falls short of the original Prime is in a few subtle areas. This game is completely sound from a gameplay perspective. The feel is still there, the game draws you in, and there’s much to discover in each and every area. However, the game is very slow to start. It has a great beginning and sets you up with a pretty intense “oh man, this is crazy” feeling once you first meet the enemy Ing and see them possess corpses and bring them to life. But soon after, you are left to wander, and the game feels so large and directionless. As you go further, you see this was probably intentional, but the sheer size of the areas (some are ridiculously huge) combined with a blander background (compared to the first game, at least) leads to a slow start, which is not good for a game like this.

On the environments, it is not that they are uninspired, which would be completely untrue. The problem is, they covered SO much ground with the first game (lush overgrown valleys, ruins, lava caverns, arctic tundras, to name a few) that there was little they could do in this game that wouldn’t feel like rehashing. So we get a main hub that appears desert-like in some areas, and has some bit of vegetation here and there. The first large area, Agon Wastes, is very similar in look and feel to the temple hub. Then there is the Torvus swamp/bog area, which feels like an extension of the Tallon Overworld from Prime. The most intriguing area is Sanctuary, and technological paradise that has turned into a deathtrap as the Ing have possessed the technology and security features and use them against you. The air there flows upward with transparent sine waves, and the drop from its high mountainous perch has lights as far as the eye can see (which honestly makes no sense, is there a city that’s thriving down there on this planet overrun by evil or what?). This area also has large labs, big fights, and great puzzles. This area’s dark world is also more interesting than the most of the other Dark Aether areas. There unfortunately is just a lot of Dark Aether areas that feel really forgettable. The design is solid, but the colors are all so drab, feature lots of dull purple and dark black to match the Ing themselves. There are exceptions, but in Retro’s attempt to make the world’s very different, it feels like they made the main world more like Prime (bright and vibrant), and they tried to make Dark Aether kinda black, dark, edgy, and evil, but it doesn’t always come across this way.

Then there are the enemies inhabiting these environments. The enemy design is generally pretty great. Most enemies feel like they belong in the areas, and many of them aren’t pushovers, requiring you to think and hit certain spots on them or use a certain visor/beam to expose a weakness. Ing possession happens on almost every creature, and while at first this is a scary thing, you begin to realize that the enemy doesn’t really change all that much, it just becomes black and can take an extra hit or two. This isn’t such a big deal, as there are original Ing creatures too, but when you face a boss that is just a glorified version of a common enemy, this is a little disappointing. Luckily, the major boss fights are large and usually incredibly epic. There is the sandworm creature who towers above you, then the cocoon/wasp monster who tests your patience, and even a gigantic possessed robot which requires you to use almost all the skills you have acquired. All the bosses, in fact, do a great job of making you use all your abilities, which is something I wish more games did. No upgrade feels unneeded. There’s even morph ball only bosses, which are fun and frustrating at the same time. I have to say that the Dark Samus enemy was interesting, but not very original. After Fusion did the same basic story, this comes off as a bit of a rehash, even though it does make sense in context with the first game. I wish they would have either focused more on this creature or not included it all together, because I don’t feel it shows up enough to be the main villain, but it pretty much is regarded as such.

Regardless of some small quibbles, I really enjoyed re-entering the Prime universe for a second time. Everything was familiar and yet new at the same time. It’s more puzzles, action, and slightly-but-kinda non-linear gameplay that most fans have come to expect. There’s even a fun multiplayer mode that, while not incredibly deep, is fun to dive into once in awhile with a few friends. There’s plenty to explore and unlock in the main game as well, and there is an excellent story that really makes this another must-have game for the Gamecube.